Happy is the man [woman] whom God correcteth:...For He maketh sore, and bindeth up: He woundeth, and His hands make whole.
Job 5:17-18
Life is beautiful, and healthy relation-ships help to nurture and sustain its beauty. However, strong healthy relationships are attained always by going down roads that are paved with pain or sacrifice. On these roads, God gives challenges that are difficult to swallow. They make us want to run and hide like Elijah, the prophet, under a juniper tree. 1Kings19:5.
Some people have been emotionally and physically hurt by a parent(s), a spouse, a partner, a child, a relative, a friend or even a stranger, and this hurt can leave scars that make trust an unconquerable mountain. The broken allow countless opportunities for healing to pass in the wind while they nurse "forever" the past. Though hope holds out its hands in ceaseless grace to offer healing relationships with people who actually care, fear chokes the budding trust and they never grab onto the blessing that God offers like a fragrant flower every day. This may lead to chronic depression, anxiety and a myriad of mental health illnesses that may lead to introverted behavior, social isolation, and for some suicidal ideation.
While a one-size-fits-all solution is not for everyone, I have found in my broken "moments" that journalling, talk therapy (giving a person free rein to talk about their hurts or fears without judging, and just listening), practicing forgiveness, and learning to trust God AND another human being are super helpful. Forgiving the person who violated your trust/ innocence can be difficult at first, but when you realize that you have given that person a powerful stronghold in your life and that "they are winning" while you are "losing" -- making a mess of your potential, and settling for less than you deserve-- it begins to put things into proper perspective. While praying to God is the highest level of talk therapy, talking to someone, whether a counselor, pastor, or friend, is essential because it opens the door to social and emotional mental health which fulfills the desire for human connectivity.
I've found that a relationship with Jesus provides a buffer system from living a life of fear and vacillation in relationships of all kinds. l am able to open my heart to learn to trust again and be ok with being vulnerable. The life of Christ has taught me that if I want to love like Him, I cannot be afraid of rejection or being hurt. That is the way of a coward who has not " fallen on the Rock and be broken." Matthew 21:44. It is trying to do God's work: it is self-saving instead of allowing God to save (heal us). In the past, instead of trusting God to shield my heart, I was busy putting all sorts of things in place to secure my fortress. When the Bible said to guard your heart, it never meant that you or I should put up so many roadblocks that Christ cannot have enough room to heal totally and others do not have room to earn your love and be loved by you in return. Such a way of life is physically, and emotionally exhausting for you and all involved in your close circle! It guarantees social suicide and promotes spiritual coldness.
Compassion, gratitude, and laughter are triplets that open the door to wholeness in people who suffer from chronic disappointments/ or depression, abandonment, or loss. Compassion is seeing others who suffer too and searching for ways to help them. It includes the ministry of gratefulness: appreciating the good things in one's life, magnifying them, and sharing them to encourage others. This in turn allows you to see beauty all around in an otherwise ugly world and you are able to laugh more than you cry.
For me, knowing God as my Father and Jesus as my Savior has made a world of difference in maintaining mental, spiritual, and physical health. This relationship sweetens all of my life! It erases my painful past while making new and positive memories that play therapeutic melodies that continually heal my heart.
I am special and so are you, therefore God can do the same for you that He is doing in me. Do you want a different life? A joyful life? Begin by doing something EVERY DAY to improve, beautify and ennoble the life that Christ has expensively purchased with His blood: Forgive, Heal, Love, Be Compassionate: genuinely do something or say something nice to at least one person (especially to someone who you believe don't deserve it). Be grateful: tell someone thanks for something. Why not start with God? Finally laugh often, it is the best medicine for a broken heart. Proverbs 17:22.
In this world where so many people and things are broken, we need God's amazing hands to make all "things" new and whole. But He also needs us to bless others the same way He had made AND is making an incredible difference in you and me. Share your blessings, share your heart! Perhaps it will help someone else to Jesus.
Taste. Enjoy! Respond. Like! Share. Be encouraged!
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